Rest.

02 Aug Rest.

I’m learning a lot about this 4 letter word these days.  I thought rest was something you did while sick.  When your body clearly can’t handle life’s normal threshold of stressors because of a fever or a broken bone, you rest to regain your strength.  Or, rest is something you plan out in advance.  Like taking a vacation at the end of a very busy season of life.  For those of us who are kind enough to our bodies, rest is also something you plan into your daily life.  Giving your mind and body time at the end of a long day to rest, relax, and restore.

True rest seems to be a bit more complicated than that.

I have been sick for a while.  I ran myself a little too ragged a few months ago which resulted in a weeklong stay in a Hospital in Honduras.  My GI tract had more or less shut down.  I lost about 12 pounds in 8 days.  And what was most concerning was that the doctors were not too confident at what might be causing all of this confusion in my body.  At their suggestion, I caught the next flight home to see some answers in the U.S..  After a couple nights’ stay at a hospital in Phoenix, over two dozen tests, and a follow up appointment with an infectious disease specialist, I finally have a few answers.  I don’t think I’ve ever seen a listing of lab results that lit up like a Christmas tree with so many results out of range.

I had/have 3 enteric infections that ruled my GI tract.  One went rogue and became septic.  I’ve also have exposures to a handful of other infections, one being Dengue.  I’m happy to say that I’m on the upswing.  Many of these infections are working their way out of my system.  And per doctor’s orders.  I’m resting.  This rest is different.  It’s a forceful rest.

My body has taken a huge hit.  I’m working to regain the strength in my muscles and test the limits of my digestive system.   My immune system is in disarray and my heart has been a little more flip-floppy than usual.

I think forceful rest is necessary when your body and your heart are misaligned.  And in my case, no two things about me were pointing in the same direction.   There are many things that I was unprepared for while being on the mission field.  I had no idea that sickness would throw a monkey wrench into my bicycle-tire of a life.  It caused me to stop, when I didn’t want to stop. 

All of this stopping, and resting, and sickness makes me think about just how Jesus handled life.  Correct me if I’m wrong, but I don’t recall reading about any part of Jesus’s body shutting down during his three years of ministry.  And, I don’t think he took the disciples to Roatan for a long weekend get-a-way.  However, at various times throughout his ministry he does talk about finding true rest, true harmony, and seeking true peace in Him…amidst the chaos.  I think what Jesus was talking about was that true rest is found IN work, not from work.  Because true rest requires work.  It’s laborious to enter into rest and peace and confidence when the word is staring you straight in the face with a never-ending to-do list.  I really do think that God designed us to operate out of rest and not stress or fear, or worry.   And maybe why, now at 36, finding true rest is very difficult for me because it requires so much work to shed the layers that fear and worry have built.

I’m looking forward to learning a thing or two about resting in His good words, and trusting that true rest will come when I learn to get out of my own way.

God Bless, Anita!